I Doubt You Want to Hear

I doubt you want to hear about
The Tome I found in my attic
How I read a few words, and
Now my dog’s acting erratic.
I doubt you want to hear about
The strange noises under my bed.
How a hand taps at my window,
All gooey and bloody red.
I doubt you want to hear about
The giant ants raiding my fridge.
How they stole most my food
And ate my parakeet Midge.
I doubt you want to hear about
A visiting cat with a fiery tail.
How it set fire to my room
And drop down blazing hail.
I doubt you want to hear about
The red eyes glowing in my closet.
How blue mice with green tails
Stole my gold coins and locket.
I doubt you want to hear about
The monsters infesting my sock drawers.
How they track mud and dirt
All over my nice clean floors.
I doubt you want to hear about
The witch that crawls up my kitchen drain.
How she threatens to turn me
Inside out and steal away my brain.
I doubt you want to hear about
The latest predicament I’m in,
Involving a tall, faceless guy
And a kid with a grin.
You think the things I willingly tell
Are so very phony,
Unlike your favorite show
Which is My Little Pony.
{{video|CREEPYPASTA I Doubt You Want to Hear}}
{{By|Mmpratt99 deviantart|user=yes}}